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"The various events afford a time to look around, meet others, and explore." Column 4: 192

Speaking Availability

I speak to a large number of groups each year and give numerous workshops. I love doing it! I've met more intelligent, creative kinky folks in places that I never would have guessed than anyone could ever imagine. I'm up for more!

If you're interested in having me speak please browse through the topics below, find out what my expectations are, and then read through the biographical information for the nitty-gritty.


Suggested Topics

The Dark Side

What is Dark? Who knows what evil lurks in the human heart? What are our forbidden fantasies and what do we do with them? Leather allows a unique expression of our most inner personae, even the evil ones. How do SM and sexual activity allow us to express the animal/demon/devil within?

How does it put us in touch with our basic instincts? How does it allow us to express objectification, destruction, dread, and death? How are we expressing primitive drives for initiation, maturity, and acceptance of self into our kinky community? This is a lot more than just a presentation on biting!

The Lusting Pervert's Guide to Getting Laid

Many of us come to kink because we are seeking a sexual partner, either for the thrill of scene or a long term relationship. Yet time after time, we fail to reach our social goals. How can we learn new ways to improve our chances of success? Whether you're a wall-flower or a gigolo, here is Jack's guide to getting the kind of scene or relationship that you seek, whether it includes getting laid or not.

The Joy of Surrender

Whether we are tops or bottoms, there are things that hold us back from fully enjoying what it is that we do. Sharing his nearly 30 years of letting go, Jack Rinella will give you ideas on finding the freedom to be who you want to be, overcoming fear, shame, guilt, and the tapes that tell you that you shouldn't or can't. Here is one class where you'll find out that you're not the only one.


Face it -- breaking the ice is never easy. How do we start the dialogue that leads to play? to familiarity? or to a relationship. From hanky codes and dress to sending her roses, this seminar will increase your chances of getting what you want. Here's a chance for the wallflower in each of us to get noticed.

BDSM Arithmetic

So you want to have a polyamorous relationship? There is nothing more dangerous than adding new person to an established relationship. Let's look at the pitfalls of more with an eye to fill in the potholes so that everyone benefits from the addition and we find ways to avoid the "subtraction" of a broken hearts.

The Good Old Days

Those that don't know their history are doomed to repeat it. Let's look at how the scene has changed over the past twenty-five years and explore what is better and what we miss. Time has a way of changing life and it is only by reflection and decision that we can assure that our future is what we want it to be. Here's where "In my days" can become a beacon for the better days to come.

The Limits of Domination

The idea of living in a Master/slave relationship is significantly different than the reality of maintaining and enjoying one. How do D/s relationships really work? What guidelines should tops and bottoms use to insure that what they want is what they get? Which limits can we overcome, and how can we do that, and which ones need to be respected? This important topic is a reality check that allows us to go further than we ever dreamed we could.

How to Negotiate

Whether you're looking for a one-night stand or a 24/7/365 LTR, there are ways to negotiate so that both sides win. What is the process of negotiation? How can we make it work better? Beginning by knowing what we want, we will look for ways to understand our prospective partner's desires, and then continue along the path to creating a satisfying scene, a long term relationship, or anything along that route. Communication is key to getting what you want, but do you know what you want?

The Power Dynamic in SM

Many well-known BDSM groups have the word power in their names -- and for good reason. The power exchange is what we're all about. We will look at how power is exchanged and at ways to make that power flow more powerfully. Techniques include relaxation, visualization, and polarity creation.


The when, why, how, where, and what of maintaining multiple sexual relationships. Poly-partnering is becoming more and more acceptable, and certainly more and more evident. It's not, though, all a bed of roses. How to make it work and how to avoid it when that's what really counts.

Creating Spaces for Good Sex

Whether you live in a studio apartment on a fixed pension or have a trust fund allowance from your Rockefeller uncle, this workshop will talk about the top's toy bag, the hidden dungeon, and making good sex better by paying attention to the details. A workshop only a former altar boy could do.

My God What Am I Doing?

Why do kinky folk do what they do? This seminar will explore the reasons behind our fetishes, with emphasis on the human side of SM. We will look at the Why of SM, with a discussion of what it is and what it isn't. Our approach will be holistic, recognizing the myriad of forces that bring us together in the dungeon.

An Historical Perspective of Kinky Sex

We have an extensive, if hidden and often forgotten, History. There is more to the idea of the "Old Guard" than we think. This slide show / seminar will talk about our past and what it tells us about our present and our future. We will debunk myths and legends so that we are free to create a community as lively and exciting as the ones that created our present lifestyle. -- note this is a rather long presentation, so plan about 1.5 to 2 hrs -- but people love it.

The View From the Top and the Bottom

There is a wide continuum among SM players about the reality of our roles, from abject worshipping slave to pushy, controlling bottom on to Tops and Masters. Whether your play stems from Hedonism, Sadomasochism, or the Desire to Serve, we'll look at what it means, how to get what you want, and how to find fulfillment in getting to the "root" of what you are. We will take time to look at various fetishes, such as spanking and bondage, to find ways to increase everyone's satisfaction and enjoyment. We'll cover negotiation, limits, protocols, and getting what you want. The top's responsibilities will be discussed as well as ways to make sure your bottoms keep coming back for more. Everyone welcome.

The Vocabulary and Culture of Kink

A knowledge of our culture and our values helps bond us as a viable, if diverse community. I propose to talk about our values as the prime force that unites us, protects us, and infuses us with who we are. There is more to us than kinky sex. What are the values that we need to have among us, to teach our newbies, and to survive? From our common values we can derive the principles that under-gird our lifestyle and upon which we can continue to be successful

Giving Better Blow Jobs

The anatomy, psychology, and methodology of cocksucking. How to arouse and satisfy your male partner.

Getting Into A Kinky Relationship

Here's the hows, the wheres, and the whats of finding a partner -- for the scene, for a good time, or for a long time. We all hate the dating game and too often early success becomes a mess. Explore the meaning and the creation of relationships. Whether it's D/s or love, versatile, open, or old-fashioned, there'll be something for everyone who's decided it's not good to be alone.

Manners & Protocols

How do Leather folk treat each other in our various roles? This seminar presents ways for us to relate, top to bottom, bottom to top, master to slave and vice versa, etc. What are protocols and how do they affect that treatment?

The Primal Self

Leather allows a unique expression of our most inner personae. How do SM and sexual activity allow us to express the animal within? How does it put us in touch with our basic instincts? How are we expressing primitive drives for initiation, maturity, and acceptance of self into our kinky community? This is a lot more than just a presentation on biting!

D/s Relationships

From finding a Master to becoming a Dom, we'll discuss the myths and realities of a dominant/submissive relationship, including topics such as obedience, 24/7, protocols, training, contracts, punishment, play, communications, negotiations, and limits. Jack brings more than 25 years' experience as a Master, looking, interviewing, training, losing, loving, and dominating. He and his slave Patrick have been Master and slave for more than eight years. Come and learn what works, what doesn't, and why.

Long Term Relationships

Jack Rinella and his slave Patrick have been in a successful and kinky relationship for more than sixteen years. I'll explain how to keep your relationship alive and fulfilling and will discuss communication between partners, ways to arrive at agreement, and how to maintain a kinky life when the rest of your world keeps you otherwise occupied.

The Care & Feeding of Doms

What do Doms need, want, and seek? Often the top maintains a wall of silence in order to maintain his "position." Let's take down that wall and look at ourselves and our partners in ways that allows everyone to enjoy what happens. Without managing from the bottom, we'll try to help everyone live happily ever after.

The Slave's Point of View

With Jack's five year's experience, let this master and former slave explain what really goes on in the slave's mind and heart. This seminar will demythologize the meaning of slavery and show you that you can make your fantasy life real. I'll give you courage to seek and live the life you want, no matter where you are on the dominance-submission continuum.

Clips and Clamps

Though this is mostly about clothespins, there's a wide, wild world of things that pinch. This hands on seminar will give everyone a chance to learn what they are and how to use them. It includes the full spectrum from finding and using, from one to three hundred, as well advanced techniques like netting and tugs of wars.

The Mind Body Connection

Let's begin with an exploration of who we are as physical beings. Understanding ourselves as manifestations of brain waves, endorphins, and subconscious and instinctive activities will help us maintain a perspective on our lives and our feelings. How do we process pain? What is pleasure? Knowing ourselves is the beginning of accepting ourselves, from whence we can further develop our human capacities to feel, to enjoy, and to love.

Sex Magic

What is magic and how do we use sex magically? How does this all work and why? Using all the concepts we've explored in the previous workshops we will seek ways to grow as whole and holy beings

Spirituality in the Dungeon

In recent years the subject of SM and Spirit has become ever more popular. What is it and what does it mean? How does it happen? How can we encourage it and what about it should be avoid? Here Jack will mix his extensive philosophical and theological studies with kinky-life experience to shown the union of sex and spirit and potential it holds for better sex and the good life.

Playing with the Family Jewels

Sensitive, erotic, forbidden, and with a head of its own, the male genitalia offer a focused target for both pleasure and pain. Join Jack as he demonstrates, explains, and enjoys the toy that men never leave home. This seminar on cock and ball torture will cover the wide variety of techniques you can use on him whether you want screams of delight or pain. Yes, there will be frontal nudity.

You name It

I can talk about most anything kinky. What do you want to know? It's best to call me at 312-206-8793 and we can come up with some suitable ideas.

Some details:

I am available at the cost of my expenses: a place to stay, food, and entrance to your event.

I will fly cheap or if you’re near Chicago, drive in a rental car. I can stay in private homes but would prefer a hotel room if your event is being held at one and the attendees are doing that too.

I would appreciate a chance to sell books.

I will also do enough to make it worth your while, meaning I will do multiple workshops. I can demo as well as talk and am an excellent facilitator for discussions.

It’s best to call me here in Chicago at 773-281-0417, or email me at, and we can come up with some suitable

About me:

Jack Rinella, author of The Master's Manual, The Compleat Slave, Partners In Power, The Toy Bag Guide to Clips and Clamps, Becoming a Slave, Philosophy in the Dungeon, The Dictionary of Scene-Friendly Terms, More from the Master, and The
Dionysian Alliance
is a free-lance writer, computer professional, and college instructor. A sought-after lecturer, Jack has presented across the country, including the Leather Leadership Conference, Black Rose, Bash at the Beach, The Leather Archives and Museum, Beat Me in St. Louis, Master's Retreat, TES, Headspace in Bloomington, IN, PEER in Cincinnati, and Menamore Leather/Levi Club in Wilmington, NC, South Plains LeatherFest, and many, many more.

Born in upstate New York of Italian-American parents, he's been a high school and college teacher, a drug rehabilitation counselor, a cook, a computer salesman, a Catholic seminarian, a Pentecostal minister, an advertising copy writer, a graphic designer, and has done stints at printing, publishing, telemarketing, head-hunting, and computer consulting.

He has been active in the Leather scene since 1983, is a founding member of MAsT-Chicago, an associate member of the Chicago Hellfire Club, and has written extensively about our lifestyle for nearly eleven years. He is a weekly columnist for Gay Chicago Magazine and his writing has also appeared in Drummer, in The (San Francisco) Sentinel, and in Philadelphia Gay News.

He lives on the North side of Chicago where he passes the time writing, cruising, and falling in love whenever he can. You can contact Jack at or visit his web site at

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Revised: February 19, 2012
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